After coming up “short” to Indiana Governor Mike Pence as President-elect Donald Trump’s VP selection, a local Baltimore real estate broker is now in a fierce race to head Secretary of Housing and Urban Development (HUD).
“Folks in the know” within Trump’s inner circle have quietly leaked, for lack of authority to disclose sensitive information, that a very special “Donald” is riding hard for the role of Secretary of HUD.
“It’s a race of epic proportions”, said Donald Miller Jr a former race horse jockey in Maryland (a winner of the 1983 Preakness) and successful investor in the blighted areas of Baltimore.
The underdog, Miller goes on to say, “No one knows urban blight like me. I buy amazing buildings in the nastiest, roughest and toughest areas of Baltimore and regularly interact with the local street corner “pharmacists” (drug dealers). These are some of sharpest men I have ever met and if President-elect Trump can tap into that brain power, who knows how HUGE this could be! We can turn these nasty neighborhoods into bastions of hope for every inner city young man and women”
“I plan to make Baltimore Great Again and I know how to win!” said Miller.
Dr. Ben Carson, the current front runner for the position, is known to be a fierce competitor when it comes to dissecting brains but has no chance of getting into the minds of the men that control the street corners of Baltimore, or Detroit – his childhood hometown – for that matter.
When asked directly if he was in the running, Miller would only comment, “it’s a major horse race, and Ben doesn’t ride Triple Crown races.”
President-elect Trump’s spokesman Ben Miller and secret-advisor Newt Gingrich have both made note on National TV of Trumps desire to target inner cities as major revitalization areas to “Make America Great Again”. The Black and Hispanic American urban communities have suffered for far too long.
As the owner of Don Miller Realty, Donald mentors local Baltimore metro area real estate investors on rehabbing, rentals, commercial real estate and auctions & foreclosures.
An unidentified Trump insider was secretly overheard parroting Trumps response to the news, “I can’t believe there is yet another awesome Donald out there (attorney Donald McGahn was tapped to be White House Council Friday) to move our agenda forward!
Ben needs to step up the pace or this “short” guy and his horse are going to run right over top of him. This is Huge!…. “YUGE!”, said Trump!
Trump is rumored to go on to say, “I’m looking forward to discussing inner city revitalization with Donald in the coming days. We are getting to the finish line and we need to find and bet on winner!”
This race is getting tight and it’s coming down to the wire.
* Like much of the news about the Presidential transition, the information in this article cannot independently verified. *It should go without saying, this is a spoof.